How to raise children’s self-esteem? Comment on Orth and Robins (2022)

Since the 1960s, self-esteem has become a cornerstone of Western child-rearing. After reviewing a large body of rigorous longitudinal research, Orth and Robins (2022) conclude that self-esteem brings modest but significant benefits across all ages. However, the authors did not intend to suggest strategies for raising children’s self-esteem. The aim of my commentary is to identify such strategies. Without guidance on how to raise children’s self-esteem safely and sustainably, well-intentioned strategies, such as inflated praise, may inadvertently undermine self-esteem or even breed narcissism. Instead, interventions should be based on a theoretically informed and empirically supported understanding of the determinants of self-esteem. By targeting these determinants, interventions may be able to raise children’s self-esteem safely (i.e., without breeding narcissism) and sustainably (i.e., leading to lasting improvements in self-esteem and its presumed outcomes). Evaluating these interventions through randomized controlled trials will help build a theory of when and why self-esteem interventions work. Ultimately, this work will provide nuanced and dependable guidance to parents, teachers, and professionals on how to raise children’s self-esteem.